Maybe I am frustrated, vulnerable,angry, lonely...I just don't know. I wonder how much more can be thrown at me.
I take my credit for what failed in my marriage, I'm working on me. I can't change what happened, can't change her....just me.
I have accepted I will be divorced in a few months, I don't like it, but what can I do.
Why did I even think/hope my wife would have been here today, or the next few days when I really need someone? Why was I hoping for a call?
Did I really think she would come out of her fog?
I knew it was over, I was taking it one step at a time....this has just thrown me way back emotionally.
Why do I feel like the 1st week this happened?
There is no doubt how she feels, the death of the person who raised me, was always there for me, meant the world to me, didn't even get a flinch from her.
So here I am, awake, no sleep in sight, feeling sick....and still mourning the loss of my family.
I thought I was doing OK, guess not.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
