In the context it was used yea I do in a way pookie. Don't get me wrong she could be calling me some other words that start with an F, but it's like she started playing a little, got her feelings hurt, then immediately started throwing out the friend word. It was almost comical because it seemed like she tried to use it on the next three texts. To me it was obvious what she was trying to do.
Right now pookie I'm just trying to soak as much of this information up as I can. I thought back about the last month and the times I got the biggest reactions was when I said this is it or she thought I might be done like when I set the boundary with the OM. I just want to make sure I'm going about this the right way and not missing anything
In the context it was used yea I do in a way pookie. Don't get me wrong she could be calling me some other words that start with an F, but it's like she started playing a little, got her feelings hurt, then immediately started throwing out the friend word. It was almost comical because it seemed like she tried to use it on the next three texts. To me it was obvious what she was trying to do.
Right now pookie I'm just trying to soak as much of this information up as I can. I thought back about the last month and the times I got the biggest reactions was when I said this is it or she thought I might be done like when I set the boundary with the OM. I just want to make sure I'm going about this the right way and not missing anything
You read this as she's being afraid of losing you and she is testing you by throwing out this frienship crap.
There may be some who disagree with what I would suggest.
"W, please stop bringing up our friendship. I will be friendly and courteous but I will not be your friend. Friends treat friends with respect and that is one thing you don't have for me. Now, how's your day going? Mine is going great."
I keep coming back to the thought that I need to just tell her, "w, you do not respect and value our relationship enough to even put forth an effort. If you are not willing to try then I need to fully move on with my life." I just don't know if this is the right thing to do or if I need to use more patience with what's been going on. Deep down I know that's what I need to do but I don't have to say it. I just have to do it.
Alright everyone, I'm sitting here in bed sick so I figured what better time then now to update everyone. I had I great weekend out of town, it was nice getting away. It's been a week now since my wife and I have talked and I definitely feel myself detaching. There are moments when she still crosses my mind and that I want to talk to her, but I know that's normal. There is also this growing feeling of coldness on my part towards her too. It's not that I hate her or anything I have just been reading some threads the last few days and at times part of me just wants to move on. It's only been almost 2 months since my bomb, but my feelings really seem to be more about me and less about her. Where as before it seemed like the things i was doing were to get her back, now they really aren't so much. I still have moments like everyone does where I want to talk to her, but I know deep down if I did then this last week would be all for nothing.
Thanks man, I know that it's only been a week and I'm actually ok with it. My biggest accomplishment so far has been the realization that I'm actually doing all this for me and if my wife decides she wants to come back then I'll have to decide if that's what I really want. I know now that while both of us are responsible for this she was the one who left and she has to be the one to put herself out there for me depending on whatever it is that I feel like I need from all this for my marriage to actually continue. If that's even possible. I'm glad that I no longer feel like I should do this or that to her to get her back. I just do stuff for me and take it one week at a time.
Yea, and I do. This is just how I detach. There really isn't a one foot in, one foot out for me. I put everything into motion to move on with my life, and if something changes with my marriage then I'll cross that bridge when it happens.
Yea, and I do. This is just how I detach. There really isn't a one foot in, one foot out for me. I put everything into motion to move on with my life, and if something changes with my marriage then I'll cross that bridge when it happens.
