flowmom, thank you for the comments! It’s nice to know that someone does understand. You have expressed it far more eloquently than I have been able to. Infidelity is a complex dynamic, and as harmful as an affair can be, it is crucial for a couple who wishes to heal to come to understand what has been going on in both spouses. This requires effective communication, which include both listening and expressing needs as well as establishing boundaries.
I agree that if one’s spouse is cheating and refuses to end the affair and work on the relationship, then there is no point in continuing. As you point out, that is not what DBing is about, at least as I understand it.
