Always and Forever??????

[irishblessings]

Thanks all...
Tonight I took an hour boot camp class followed by an hour of pilates. Looking at myself in the mirror I couldn't help but tear up. First - it hurt like HE**! Second - I thought - I have buried myself beneath excess weight and neglect. But no more! I am finally accepting that H is never coming back. He is choosing a life that is far removed from the life we built with our family. Our kids cherish the life we built - the traditions and inside jokes - they looked forward to continuing those traditions through their adulthood and their own family. This may sound benign to some - but playing scrabble first thing in the morning on vacation / watching the kids dance to old hip hop songs / watching college sports / special meals / "family dinners" with close friends - these were those small things that meant so much to them and to me. I'm sorry they didn't mean the same to him - I'm sorry that he doesn't realize how much a part of these memories he was.

I am going to keep as many of those traditions going and begin to develop new ones.

I'm sad but not broken.