Thanks for the support. I have moments where I feel like I can do this, and moments where it just feels unbearable. It is so hard right now especially b/c he is till at home until the end of the week. And nights like tonight I come home and he will ask me all sorts of questions about my day, and he will sit in the t.v. room with me and talk to me like everything is normal. It will seem like things are the way they were before, but they're not.
As for more info we have on son he is two, and has been a difficult baby since he was born. We both love him to death, but he has put a lot of strain on our marriage. We have been married for 10 years. Since my son has been born things have been harder for us. We do not get together time almost ever. I put on weight with the pregnancy. I have been stressed out a lot of the time and he feels like we fight too much. Those would be the big issues that he talked about wanting to change.
When I first found out about the affair, he made a comment like he thought that I wouldn't care b/c I didn't love him anyway. So at first I thought it might just be a cry out for help, but I have tried to make it clear how much I love him since the affair and that only seems to make it worse, so that doesn't seem to be the answer.
When he first started no contact and attempting to reconcile he said that he really wanted our family back and would work for however long it took. But he witheld so much information and each new fact I would find out would set me back a bit. I would bounce back each time and keep trying, but it is almost like the more I knew about what really happened the less he was willing to work on it. Then when they started back to work together, he would come home in a funk all of the time. I would call him on it and he would get mad and we would fight. Things just went down hill from there.
