I may be a bit bias with this post and so If I am just realize that I am looking at this from the "male" or "bread winner" perspective.
First, YOU "go girl" for hanging out last night - lord knows you needed it.
As for the jewelery, the reality is that he feels like he is getting the short end of the stick. The jewelery represents an asset for YOU and he probably has no assets and if I recall no place to go. Here is where I may divert from traditional DBing tactics.
I think kindness is warranted here. Yes the bills have not gone away BUT the reality is that IF you do not reconcile EVERYONE's life will change. His, yours the kids, everyones.
In sitch's like yours...where the incoming income is enough to support ONE household (I think that is the case for you and FTR, it is the case with me as well) it comes down to...who will do what it "right".
As hard as it may be to look at your H and make him want to "pay" for his mistakes...you must ask yourself is this the person that Jennifer wants to be. I am not saying that you are being vindictive. I guess my point is try to look at how your H may view things. Yes, he is an as*hole and put himself in this position and YES you must protect yourself. BUT try and consider how he may be feeling. Compassion sweetie.
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He said I was just thinking that you sold it all and yet you keep asking me for money for the checking account, acting like I'm some kind of money pit, like you always have.
This is how he feels - most bread winners will feel this way. You cannot take it personal. All you can do is try and understand his POV.
Quote:
I'm so concerned he is going to make things really ugly for me.
Stop thinking like this. He may not. Has he withheld money before? Has he not provided for his kids in the past? Separate his actions from him the person and ask yourself (and not when your pissed) is he really that type of man?
Do what you need to do Jennifer to protect yourself...my short advice (after my ramble above)...just do what is right.
God Bless and Happy Halloween
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
