You CAN do this, will it hurt, sure, will there be moments of unrelenting anger, of course, but you will get through it. i usally state some of my facts of my life and relationships and it is uplifting for others, so here you go:
I'm on my 3rd marriage, 1st one exh got custody i paid over $600/mo and had to move home with mom.
2nd marriage, exh was from europe, i tried living there, could not take being away from d, was miserable and guilt ridden. he tried to live in usa but he had 2 children from his 1st marriage, our only solution was to divorce, we tried the long distance thing, didn't work
#3 met a boy/man 10 yrs younger, him 26 me 36, mommas boy, partier, drinker, i became codependent after knowing him for a few months and my mom/dad/grandfather/uncle passed away in a matter of 3 years, 1 child born, 1 miscarriage another child born. for teh 5 yrs of our relationship, he left us 1st time for 8 months and when pregnant with 2nd child left when i was 4 months pregnant.
i've ALWAYS been a strong woman, and not getting help to deal with all the deaths and stress, miscarraiges,everthing KILLED our marriage.
we have now been seperated a year, i see him 3 times a day for exchanges, some seem ok like we are a family, especially when d3 grabs my hand and his hand. i don't mean we are a family only in appearances. other times we are screaming and yelling at one another pushing each others buttons.
YOU can do anything, you may not like it, it may go against your morals to raise 2 kids without their father or blended family.
I live sleep, shower, eat everything my 2 youngest kids, i don't get sleep, i work, i am established, i have cut back on spending, not that i did anyways, found ways to earn more money, i'm a teacher so i teach extra classes so i do not have to rely upon support from h, did i mention he's not legally permitted to work in the united states,. that there is no legal recourse so i've been advised to collect child support and my kids could be taken across the border and nto seen again, those are some of my fears, there is tons more but my point is, we all have been there.
no cliche will help at this point or maybe it will, live one moment at a time, build it up to an hour and just keep plugging away,.
what are your short term goals?
Me 39 H 30 d 18 previous marriage d 2.5 with H s 4.5months with H Seperation Nov09 july i'm dim to dark - set internal deadline
