If anyone should move out, he should. Help him pack. You can give him plenty of "space" in the same house, but it's not space he wants, it's freedom to conduct his affair. I have told him as much that he should choose either to be commited to the marriage and act it or out and so far he is showing no interest of moving out. (Despite all this drama) What can I do? Thus my decision if he don't want to move out, I will. I have told him that I won't stay with someone who is unfaithful and he should move out (to no avail.)
You mean like bringing up the D word, talking about the R, and asking him if he is still in an A? Stay away from those topics. Do NOT argue with him. If he starts, then turn and walk away. Yes I am doing that right now, but pretty tell by giving him that freedom to continue his alliances with the OW and pretending as if his hurtful actions are not affecting me, how really does it help me. Will I not just give him a free reign to continue his business esp since he is reluctant to move out? Currently we are not even talking to each other....since doing so will result in an altrecation of words. I resort to mainly sending smses if there is some family matter that need to be attended. I bring the D word in order to have him respect my boundaries. I mean it's better for him out of my life, than him blatantly doing what he is currently doing in front of me.
What boundaries (beside contacting OM) has he done in your home? His excessive smsing as well as his blatant disrespect.
Has he ever hit you when he was angry? No but the words that come from his mouth are like a two bladed sword. They cut to the deepest.
Go to the library, shop, visit the sick, whatever you want to do, but get out away from him! Do something for yourself. Way to go I have a couple of things planned up for the following period...that do not include him obviously. So say he offers to go with us do I reject him?
Don't tell him that you are trying to change. Don't pursue him. Don't do anything to pressure him to show his feelings, talk to you, give you affection, spend time with you, etc. Don't cry in front of him. Don't throw mad fits around him. Don't talk very much. Wait for him to be in charge of talking and if he doesn't.....then there will be no discussions!
Way to go. So when he wants to talk do I listen and talk with him. Or I just show a disinterest.
