I am in a super chipper mood today. I wasn't starting out but I have forced myself to be... and it is catching on inside my head. Better yet, I have had to run into both him and her at different times and he is clearly irritated with me and my mood... I smiled and told her "hey"... she didn't have anything to say & kept walking.
And early this morning he gave me the opportunity regarding talking about this at work: "I just wanted to say- please don't talk to me about our personal issues here at work" He didn't listen and repeated asking me about some financial info... I said 'yeah, I don't want to talk about it here'... this was the beginning of the irritation...
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
You should be proud of yourself! Especially for telling him to not talk about your personal issues at work. At the laest it may give you some breathing room.
I haven't been doing this much longer than you, but it is getting easier. I am doing better at taking care of myself and my daughter now. I also recover more quickly when I take a hit.
I have had this same feeling lately. It is getting easier. I take two steps forward and one step back... but that still means I am one more step forward than I was before! I also feel that the things that would have had me crying before just give me a sick feeling but then, I get my appetite back more quickly... Good for us!! I know how hard this is for me... I can't even imagine doing this if we had a child. You are one strong woman zen.
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
Having a kid raises the stakes, but it also forces you back to day to day life. Even when all I wanted to do was stay in bed and cry for days, I couldn't. Still had to get up, cook, take care of her, and try to keep her life as stable as I could.
The questions they as are hard though, especially when there are no answers yet. I'm the one who gets hit with all the questions too. She doesn't ask daddy. Think she picks up that I am the strong one right now.
It feels good because you are taking control of the situation instead of hanging on for the ride of the roller coaster. It feels good because you are being strong and he is being weak. YOu are taking the high road
Keep it up!!!!
M39 W41 Two children WAW bomb dropped 11/7/09 Piecing Aug 10 - Nov 10 No longer piecing...Nov 10 Separation Jan 11 EA ends again Feb 11 Piecing attempt #2, Mar 11
You are very right GW! I feel in control of my life and am starting to realize how many opportunities are open to me now. I always wanted to practice in another country for a while and travel... I can now go wherever I want! That is liberating. Not that I would trade that in for my marriage but, if that is the way it is going to be, I am going to live it up
I keep thinking about something else that happened yesterday. My H is known for being a real people-pleaser and that is why people really value him in the hospital. Yesterday, I requested a procedure on a case and have to do that by asking him when he is on... He tried to withhold! Shrugging his shoulders and telling me they would do it if they had time. He NEVER does this to ANYONE... I shrugged my shoulders too and said that it is Dr. XXX that will be doing the procedure so you two can decide when you want to do it. That snapped him out of it and the procedure was done immediately. LOL! My mood and telling him I don't want to discuss our personal life at work seemed to really get to him. Good or bad, IDK but come on... really? trying to pull that BS at work?
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
