Mish - I don't know about the timing, but home or center-based hospice is really a God-send. My mother knew she was terminal for more than 18 months, so I can empathize with all the doctors/hospital trips/etc. I think the idea of letting family know that she is there at the hospital is a good one - could you even put an email out to family saying that she needs meal-time company on M-W-F afternoon (or whatever - and to let you know when they can make it over there...? Sometimes people say they want to help and be supportive, but they honestly have no idea what they can actually DO....if they can't visit, maybe make up a few casseroles for the house so you don't have to cook every night. Something. Put this out to your church group, too - good people know that having the opportunity to help others is a blessing onto them.
