After all, you were uninterested in the spouse while you were neglecting them, and they apparently did not find that attractive since they are WA...It seems there needs to be an interest in something new and healthy (i.e., a change on your part)?
Excellent example for this thread. You have a spouse that is uninterested to, unattracted to, orphans you. And you try ...
whether you use the divorce busting approach, the begging, pleading approach, your own form of Last Resort Technique, eventually shut down and turn off, or the whole shock and turmoil of the situation causes you a mid-life-crisis
there comes a point where you need to make yourself happy for a change.
There is nothing wrong with coming to the conclusion that you cannot make this other person happy and that it is making you unhappy and you want to be happy.
6, 9 months, some going on 2 years of depression and co-dependence for someone that is uninterested and not attracted to them, moves on and starts a new life without them, what they are doing is not working.
Make Yourself Happy For A Change.
You read here a lot of excitement when a wayward spouse brings over cookies, or talks on the phone all night, or shows a glimmer in their eye that something might still be there, and of the heartbreak when they later continue to live their life as they are doing. What did you learn? That people can love more than 1 person, that you never know whats buried in someone's heart for that person they knew long ago, that people want to want and be wanted. That people love different people in different ways, or maybe that sometimes people use what ever technique they can to get what they want.
I don't know much about severe neglect or addictions like compulsive gaming. But I can understand why it becomes unhealthy physically and mentally to their spouse. I can understand why they leave. And don't blame them.
Me, I'm addicted to being happy. It's exciting. It feels great. I feel like sharing it with everyone around me. If I don't make someone happy and whatever I try to do doesn't make them happy. There is nothing wrong with me. Why should I feel there is something wrong with me? If they don't like me, why should I change? Maybe like Wendy and Gina, I just need to move on.
