I would wait on the D thing. You are moving FAST. I'm not saying you are doing anything wrong, but you are deploying soon. Things could look very different in a few months. Considder the deployment a gift.
Do what you need to do to get yourself safe. New bank accounts, retain a L, learn the law. But really, a D is going to take a long time. And it really IS your ace in the hole.
My guess it that once she has her freedom, she WILL enjoy it. For a while. One the bills start rolling in, and the car breaks down, and she really start pursuing the OM (very likely) things might not look so rosy. THAT is the time to play the D card if things are not looking your way.
M:37 W:34 M:4 years T:6 years No Kids A disclosed - 9/1/2010 W asks for separation - 10/19/2010 Moving on - 10/24/2010 A ends (and I believe her) - 12/2010 Content - 3/1/2011 Served - 3/18/2011 D Day - 6/20/2011
