oh and I am getting the reality check that Gucci warned me about.. I am waking up and seeing that she WAS/IS still having the affair.. why else would she NOT attempt to truly work on the marriage? What I saw with my own eyes at the TKD studio cant be rationalized away.. she is lying.
M:42 W:39 S:9 M:20 T:25 D-bomb: 30 Sep 10 Wife changed her mind: 31 Oct 10 Working on it: 31 Oct 10
I would wait on the D thing. You are moving FAST. I'm not saying you are doing anything wrong, but you are deploying soon. Things could look very different in a few months. Considder the deployment a gift.
Do what you need to do to get yourself safe. New bank accounts, retain a L, learn the law. But really, a D is going to take a long time. And it really IS your ace in the hole.
My guess it that once she has her freedom, she WILL enjoy it. For a while. One the bills start rolling in, and the car breaks down, and she really start pursuing the OM (very likely) things might not look so rosy. THAT is the time to play the D card if things are not looking your way.
M:37 W:34 M:4 years T:6 years No Kids A disclosed - 9/1/2010 W asks for separation - 10/19/2010 Moving on - 10/24/2010 A ends (and I believe her) - 12/2010 Content - 3/1/2011 Served - 3/18/2011 D Day - 6/20/2011
Protect yourself financially, retain an attorney, let her go, and drop the rope, and then wait until your emotions settle down a little unless she presses for divorce.
If she does that, then go ahead and proceed. Don't fight her, but protect yourself, your child, and so on.
You're going to be OK.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
Rope is dropped. I am committed to that action. We are going to meet next week to discuss the finances and what goes where etc. I have let her go.
Step 1: Discuss finances with her next week and separate accounts Step 2: Get her out of the house next week and into her own place. Step 3: Move back in to my house. Step 4: GAL
Step 5: D if required
M:42 W:39 S:9 M:20 T:25 D-bomb: 30 Sep 10 Wife changed her mind: 31 Oct 10 Working on it: 31 Oct 10
This weekend. After the MC you are free. Seems like a good opportunity to take advantage of the weekend.
M:37 W:34 M:4 years T:6 years No Kids A disclosed - 9/1/2010 W asks for separation - 10/19/2010 Moving on - 10/24/2010 A ends (and I believe her) - 12/2010 Content - 3/1/2011 Served - 3/18/2011 D Day - 6/20/2011
