thanks 25. you made me look at my m in a different light. i don't think i'd save it because i wasn't a great wife. i deserved to be left behind.
the best thing i can do right now, is to tell my lawyer to give my h my share of the house money. yes, i contributed to the home. but the damage i did .. he should get all of it, including the contents.
i should apologize to his mother and father. and also repay them for the wedding expenses they incurred.
i guess i thought i was doing the right thing but maybe not.
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You'll have to change the angry part, won't you? Do you see how you are the only person who can change this? Do you believe that?
yes, the anger has suddenly turned to depression. i don't deserve to live.
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Wow, really? Like who? And I don't buy that. But if this is what you want, it is a recipe for loneliess and for the life of me, why come here if that's what you want? B/C it's not what you want. You're simply terrified of being hurt again, like all of us. I'm no shrink, but to me, a lot of your behaviors were sort of gearing toward making him leave you. Why would you sabatage your m so many ways?
because i don't deserve anybody. i'm such a horrible person. it's all my fault.
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Oh good grief. NO MAN CAN OR SHOULD Provide us with that, when it is WE who give ourselves our own security. Our h's kill bugs for us and check out the weird noises for us, but in modern life we are PARTNERS...we have to show up for each other.
really? my h said that he'd be there for me if i was dying in a hospital. but otherwise, i'm on my own.
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Sorry for the 2 x 4 but I think you are playing the victim and doing as little serious introspection as possible. When you start to get close to an issue of REAL intimacy or deeply painful ones, you redirect the discussion and make it political or you simply totally blame him. BTW, where's the MIL in all this? Do you see your h at all?
my head is in a bit of a tizzy from the 2x4s .. my MIL is there. i don't want to re-live it.
i don't see my h at all. he left me. why would we see each other?
it looks like i have some serious issues to address. thanks for your input.
i'm such a horrible person. it's all my fault. 
