no worries I am not there and I am not persuing, I am not communicating. I am being me for the first time since she nuked me and I am doing stuff for myself. Feels kinda cool not having to answer to anyone!!!
M:42 W:39 S:9 M:20 T:25 D-bomb: 30 Sep 10 Wife changed her mind: 31 Oct 10 Working on it: 31 Oct 10
The best thing you can do is leave her completely alone. Do not engage her about ANYHING that your kid.
No small talk. No "how ya doin?"... Nothing.
Starting right now, and going for an undetermined period of time, you don't care how's shes doin'... And you don't need for her to know how you're doin' either... Cause you're doin' fine my man, just fine.
And that's how you act.
No matter how horrible you feel inside or how much you miss her, you are fine. You aren't going to die from this... This is just for now. Things change. Things ALWAYS change. You can't predict HOW... But I promise you, this phase you're going into won't last very long in comparison to your entire life.
Things WILL change... And when they do you deal with it then.
And just for the record, because I don't have my "stats" in my signature, I am one of the men on this site who is currently in peicing, and it's going well.
This after I spent the crappiest and most horrible 5 months pursuing my wife... FINALLY accepting that the only men who actually DO get second chances are the ones that really DO just let her go... Letting her. No contact, and I mean zero words spoken for almost 3 months (no kids) and one little phone call, which was intentionally to talk about the divorce, and here I am,
Both my wife and I slept with other people, both of us had rebound relationships.
It as horrible.
effin' HORRIBLE.
It tore us both apart.
That lasted 5 months.
And then we just got the hell away from each other. Completely.
Funny things happen when you just let go and live your own life, and I'm talking BOTH of you now.
You BOTH need to get away from each other and really see what life is like without.
If you both really DO love each other, you WILL get a second chance at it. If you DO love each other, I guarantee it.
Holy crap... I did not mean to go on such a huge rant... Sorry.
And now, my wife should be just getting on the train to come to my apartment and eat pizza and watch a movie.
I will move back in in 2 weeks and if she is still there tell her to get moving. like yesterday or two weeks ago.
Didn't you tell her a couple of weeks ago that she had 'til the end of the month? You've already backed down on one boundary. I'll lay odds she does NOT have a place in two more weeks.
