Why would you want to criticize at all? Criticism is ineffective in setting boundaries, since it tends to shut the other person down. And it is engaging in the very behavior we wish to have the other stop doing.
Have you ever had to lead (not manage) people? Coach or teach them? Ever had to get clients in your professional life change a behavior for their own good?
Criticism is just feedback, it's not personal when you address a behavior that needs to be changed. Attacking someone is ineffective.
I criticise people all day long - at work, coaching (boys and girls), my marriage, friends, etc. It's just feedback, here's what I see. People pay me for advise professionally. I get paid to coach. When I observe something, I either say well done (met the goal) or here's how to improve (solution). People love it when I criticise them, when they know how much I care that they do well for themselves. It's the people who take it personal that struggle. I address that when needed and sometimes I have to let it go because it's not my problem.
I enjoy learning so I welcome criticism and feedback. It helps me do a better job if it is valid. It's my responsibility to listen. Criticism sharpens my skills and makes me stronger, wiser, and more productive.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I wouldn't. It's ineffective and doesn't help me achieve the results I want.
But it's all you've done. You've criticised every post where somebody says it's OK to call bad behavior what it is.
That, my friend, is criticism.
Are you acheiving your intended results? And what results did you 'intend' ?
In memory of Puppy.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Also, FWIW, I don't use "conscious" and "unconscious" in any deeply spiritual sense. When I am "unconscious" simply means that I am in the grip of my feelings and am reactive rather than responsive. I am unable to hear what the other person is communicating. When I am "conscious," I am aware of my feelings but not being driven by them. So I am able to hear them.
I think the word concious is going to throw off a lot of people. It is technically speaking a legitimate term to use, but most people see the term unconcious as being asleep.
Impulse control is probably a better characterization of what you are talking about here...
crit·i·cism   /ˈkrɪtəˌsɪzəm/ Show Spelled [krit-uh-siz-uhm] Show IPA
–noun 1. the act of passing judgment as to the merits of anything. 2. the act of passing severe judgment; censure; faultfinding. 3. the act or art of analyzing and evaluating or judging the quality of a literary or artistic work, musical performance, art exhibit, dramatic production, etc. 4. a critical comment, article, or essay; critique. 5. any of various methods of studying texts or documents for the purpose of dating or reconstructing them, evaluating their authenticity, analyzing their content or style, etc.: historical criticism; literary criticism. 6. investigation of the text, origin, etc., of literary documents, esp. Biblical ones: textual criticism.
Please let me know. Thanks!
