She may not have told her support group the entire truth about the finances. Sounds to me that you are providing all of her physical needs (food, shelter, etc.) then willing to split the remaining cash. How could you be more fair than that? There is a reason she is focused on wanting just cash! She isn't looking at the over-all responsibilites of the household expense, she is "planning" her escape and she needs money to live in the style she's fantasizing about.
You can expect her to come back from those meetings all fired up. Don't even bother trying to "reason" with her. It's a waste of time.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
