I don't know how the two of you originally decided to go out..whose idea it was, etc. I guess that would figure in to how I would handle it. If it was your idea..I believe I would hold off, and this is why. You still aren't sure that you can just be friends with him, and nothing more. Unless you have definitively decided this in your heart/mind, it might be playing with dynamite. And believe me, after your meltdown, he realizes this too, and that's why he ran. You don't want to do something that makes him think you're doing it just to be with him...regardless if it's hurting or not.
You have to be in 'that place' that it really does mean 'just friends' and nothing more. Otherwise he'll pick up on it no matter how good of an actor you try to be. Down the road..who knows, but that's not what you want to be concerned about right now anyway. Besides, even if you did go out with your friends, with your H along, it still isn't going to feel like 'the old days', is it? You'll be sitting there wondering why it can't feel like the old days...when everything seemed so normal and right. It won't feel like that at all, I'll guarantee you. You'll be on your guard, and he'll be on his.
This was a recent meltdown, and only when you know for a certainity that you will NOT meltdown again, is it safe to consider doing something as a couple with people that are friends of both of you. I've been there. It is not comfortable trying to act 'normal' when you know darn well it's not the normal you were so accustom to.
Some type of an outing where you both will be active doing something, and not have to make a lot of conversation...a safe setting, where you're enjoyment comes mainly from the activity, and not so much from being together would be a lot safer..and could make for a new positive memory for both of you.
Somewhere down the road, when your feelings are more stable, you can always say "Friend, sorry I melted down" I'm working on it. Thank you for understanding." I bet he'll appreciate your honesty and look forward to seeing that change...but remember, he WILL be watching to see if you're actually able to change. So again, make sure you are doing it for YOU, not him.
Enjoy the weekend with your friends. If HE would happen to ask about going, then go with your heart, and don't try to analyze any of it. Just remember...silence can be golden, as hard as it is to do. I swear, if ANYTHING positive came out of my situation, it was that I learned to keep my mouth shut, and just listen. No small feat. LOL
Women are angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible
