WAW 20 years not sure where I am right now.

[Truegritter]

Actions not words

Meaning don't tell her how you've changed show her.

The way you talk to her

The way you respond to her

Your body language

Your voice tone

Everything you do.

I need to look at the rest of your thread but guessing by your register date you are in process of detaching?

That is key man. Until you do that you have so much emotion behind your words...

She'll sniff you out.

Try to fake it till you make it.

Like a duck in the rain...

[Pensacolabroken]

Truegrit yea I am detaching. Appreciate your comments. Loved the movie by the way with the Duke they are remaking it

[Pensacolabroken]

Update.

Lame birthday attempt from wife. She was not into it and it felt forced. I pretended to enjoy it all for S sake.

After son is in bed she asks me if I plans this weekend because she does. I say I do and am going out Saturday night. she says good. I ask her if she wants to come along she says no.

She then wants to discuss finances more. She wants to know what I am doing with the money if I sell my truck.

She also wants me to contact a realtor tomorrow to sell our vacant property.

I ask her why she is going to marriage counseling? she says for our son. I tell her then lets use this Friday session to figure out how to tell our son because I am not going to remain in a marriage that my wife doesnt love me, or respect me, and wont commit to the marriage. I then told her I accept her decision to divorce, I am going to agree with what she wants and I am moving out tomorrow.

I told her we will figure out the finances this coming week when I can figure out what we are spending and where.

I told her I will file for Divorce as soon as my truck sells and I have the money for retainers.

she agrees. I tell her I dont want her to bring any men into my home while I agree to move in with my Dad.

I intend to have little to no contact. We are still going to the marriage counselor on Friday but I do not intend on seeing the wife after that. I am simply through with her crap and I am moving on. I am going Gucci on her.

Sorry it took this long.. she was playing me for time and I am not going to pay her damn bills while I am deployed so I am going to accelerate this.

[Pensacolabroken]

oh and Guccci and Starsky I could use your support now that I am implementing the only real way to end this misery.

[Starsky309]

I completely understand, P-cola.

Starsky

[TimeHeals]

OK, why are you moving out of your home, and why are you still trying to say who your wife can and cannot see if you are seperating and letting go.

A boundary: I will not live in an open marriage.

OK. Fine. How does that translate into this plan? I will move, you will stay here and not bring men here?

Not getting it.

[Pensacolabroken]

Time,

sorry for the confusion.. she cant move out today right now.. she wants me to have the house. I agreed to take it.. the CB is starting to show up and effecting my S. I told her I will TEMPORARILY move to my Dads.. 1-2 weeks while she activly finds her place to live. I told her I will help her move and I intend to. My leaving is a temporary band aid and she told me she will look for her place to live and she has appointments lined up for tomorrow and Saturday.

I am tired of the drama. I just want her out. I am only leaving for the week or two.. I intend to pester, bug and badger her to move out and I will pack her crap for her.

does that clear it up?

as for her dating? after last night at the TKD I dont care anymore. Just not in front of my son.

[konfuseeed]

Give her a week and then ask her if she has a place yet. If need be give her another week but after that 2 weeks if she's still not gone move back in.

[TimeHeals]

does that clear it up?

A little. I still feel like I missed something in this story. Maybe I should go back an re-read before I ask you to explain more

Be careful.

[NotFromThesePart]

PB,

Remeber that it ain't over. A few things:

1) If you told her 1-2 weeks while she looks YOU MUST HOLD HER TO IT! If you cave, you've set yourself up.

2) When you say "Sorry it took so long", by my count it was 3 weeks since you registered. I don't think that is long. However, I think these tactics are much more powerful when done quickly.

3) I'm only a few days into my decision. I already feel MUCH better. Once you've decided, just go implement it.

Good luck!