She wrote me this email today in reply to some R talk that sprang up last night when we were talking about the separation:
"Do you have any idea what it is like to feel like you are absolutely everything to someone? It's suffocating. I've tried (many times) to express to you how hard it is for me to discern how I really feel from how I (and you) think I should feel. I can't see the forest for the trees. It's like you just wanted to keep plowing ahead through a snowbank that is completely frozen and all you're doing is packing the snow harder. Sometimes you have to give it time to thaw before you can start again."
WOW. Did she really write this?
PH,
You are running away when she's point blank telling you what she wants and needs.
You almost sound like you are trying to punish her for not being where you want her to be RIGHT NOW. I see you not getting your way, so you are giving up.
Why do you spend so much time on these boards? Just for $h!ts and giggles? Or to save yourself and your marriage?
I do not see you getting YOUR desired results/expectations met by physically moving out.
And like fb2 said.....You can change your mind.
Anytime you change your mind because of your self respect and your values you do it from a place of strength. That is a good thing and it's going to be hard for her to not respect that decision.
PH, don't move out. And you mentioned dating? In your sitch, you might as well just light your marriage certificate on fire and file divorce. Based on that email from her, you are obviously doing something that is working...why would you sabotage all your hard work now?
