I have an awesome relationship with my MIL. She effectively sided with me in all this, since she thinks her daughter is being selfish and foolish at the expense of her kids. I had absolutely no issue with embracing MIL's help and support. Truthfully, I really needed her to help care for the kids for a while after W left.
W responded with her usual erratic behavior. At first she considered that her mother betrayed her by siding with me (with the kids really), said she was "done" with her mother, blah, blah, blah. If I had a nickel for every time she said she was "done" with someone. The she put her therapist hat on and said I was using her Mom as a substitute for her. Wow, the ego she has. Then her attitude morphed into being glad her mother helped me so much, because I "needed" her. Lately it's back to feeling betrayed, as in "I'll never forgive her for not just loving me and supporting me." Her Mother never stopped loving her. She just refused to offer her support toward something she saw was destroying our family and hurting her grandchildren.
v1olin, you have every right to have whatever relationship with your XW's family you want. Her attitude about it is irrelevant.
