I believe nothing works more in your favor - given these circumstances - then him having to continue working through these mixed feelings without push or pull from any outside source.
When a ship is at sea and a storm hits, the objective is to secure everything above and below deck not to stand back and let it run roughshod over the boat and risk damaging the hull.
And I agree with Starsky here.. the OP is very much an outside source... If the LBS does nothing, and the OP pulls, spouse is gonna go that way not to you...
