Wife is cheating, am sad but confused?

[HopelessInLove]

There were things that happened in her childhood. Tramatic? IMO, yes. She has told me and the MC that she has no problems now because of it.
She also has a very controlling father. Impacting her childhood also? IMO, yes.
My family and how they try to control me and my M probably has also impacted her.
Me trying to get through to her my needs after sometime in the R, after we started to have problems. In arguments I asked if we were headed for divorce because she would not try C, beacuse of problems. Did this impact her? Yes.

Is she a victim?
I would say yes to some of those things.

But all of these events have impacted her.