Good Sunday morning friends:) Hope you all have great fall day! We have fires starting around here due to the drought conditions. The smell of burning leaves - all day, every day!
Spent a long time talking to my mother last night. Interesting that we behaved very differently in our marriages and ended up in the exact same place. Thought I married someone completely different from alcoholic father - and I actually did - however bottom line comes down to choices. H made a choice to leave - Father made a choice to leave.
I am learning though to spend more time thinking about what I know - 1. I know H is missing out on sharing his life with a pretty great person - ME - - 2. I know H is missing out on incredible moments with teenage S 3. I know I have a lot of potential that I will attain 4. I know that I have 3 amazing kids who see ME as their rock 5. I know I have wonderful friends and family who are there for me in an instant 6. I know I am a healthy person today 7. I know I have a lot of work to do on improving my self-esteem and not taking on the blame for everything that happens in the world 8. I know that if I were honest with myself - with H removed from the house - the air is cleaner (figuratively) - I'm not worried about stepping on toes / making someone angry / worried about him engaging in sexual addiction behaviors and crazy sick stuff 9. I know I am closer to God than I have ever been
I know I am working on: 1. Relaxing more 2. Toning 3. Eating healthy 4. Catching up 5. Dreaming 6. Planning
Pretty good start for a Sunday!
M-48/XH-48 M=25/T=28 years Ds-24,22/S-18 D - 3/11 A Day at a Time
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