SHould I say I love you?

[Truegritter]

Respect me,

How can you demand this? Respect is earned and its starts with your own self respect.

Why do you need her to give this to you?

Why do you think you are entitled to this? Because you are married to her?

Your self respect will be recovered when you decide what YOU want.

And don't let her or anyone else sway you from YOUR choices.

Do you want to get divorced? Then get divorced but do it because that's what you want

Not as a reaction to some choice your W made.

You want to be married? Then do you think fighting with her, making demands and forcing her is going to work?

No excuse for her choice to have an affair (yes she is having an affair) If she is talkig about dating this dude to your face.

It is fact.

BUT

You had a part on the demise of this M.

dump you "not boyfriend"

You don't control this either. So ...

Demanding it ain't going to anything.

and work for change

What are you doing to change yourself? Cause that is the only thing you control.

If she came back right now what would change?

or GTFO because I am better than this.

You may be better than this. I hope you are.

But that has nothing to do with how your W is treating you.

It is what you decide to do with this adversity in your M.

You are not better than this by just saying it.

Your W is not going to see you as that either by you saying it and acting how you've been acting.

You can't talk your way out of something you acted your way into.

So

What do want? What are you going to let your wife decide for you by her actions and choices.

You can run away and find some other woman to make you feel better but at the end of the day...

It is still you in the mirror.

What do you want?

Time to take charge of this and make your own choices.