Have I thought about leaving? Yes! However, I adamantly (or stupidly) believe that it is possible to work things out. I know that I love my husband and that he loves me. H used to threaten to leave me, or to have an affair, or even to bring another woman into our lives just for sex. Those were very hurtful threats to me. I felt that he didn't love me enough to try to work with me. Remember that I never wanted to not have sex, I just wasn't comfortable with his attitude and beliefs about sex, and the way that he treated me in regard to sex. These days I believe that if he is unhappy enough with me to leave, then that is what he should do, but he has not made threats in a long time. If anything, we have traded shoes. The disparity in our personalities has caused stress in our relationship that goes beyond our sex life and over time I have lost patience and respect for him and what I see as his undesirable behaviors. I am not planning on leaving, but I also don't want to spend my life battling with him and suffering from the loss of self confidence and self esteem that are a result of the battles. I know deep down that if we separated I would be just fine and he would be the one struggling...but that is not what I want for us. I think he also realizes that his life would not necesarrily be nicer without me and I do believe that he wants our marriage to remain in tact and for both of us to be happy with each other.
