men telling other men that women need to feel financially secure in a relationship - yet, it is the men who turn around and accuse the women of marrying them for their money? I think it is a huge area of concern for men. They feel? vulnerable? in this area
whatever it is .. i don't buy it. the vets can preach that but guys will turn around and accuse us of marrying them for their money.
Quote:
It occurs all over these boards. Again, we are nothing special.
not that i've read. but that's not say i think i'm unique. i just don't think this happens often. from what i see, the fight is usually over kids. when the fight is over the kids, then you know that both parents are human. they value their relationship with their children. very different mindsets.
Quote:
The only thing not all over the boards is your insight into you. Explore that more.
here's a piece of insight that i discovered. it's not about "wanting to teach him a lesson". all this time, i kept saying "i didn't get to say my piece" or "i want to make him realize what the consequences are" and "i want to teach him a lesson to not do this." it isn't about teaching him a lesson.
i found myself actually saying .. i no longer want to be a doormat. i learned what was bothering me. he was controlling the situation and i allowed it. he walked all over me and finally, i said .. enough. and i did.
i need to stop obsessing. it's extremely unattractive and makes me look like a complete crazy woman. really unattractive.
i guess i'm sad about your sitch because i was hoping your sitch would survive. when i read that he had filed, my heart sank.
i know you are in a good place, but you sound like me a few months ago .. where life was great. and now life kinda sucks again but who knows. still lots to think about. i actually want to go away somewhere for a month to truly grieve the end of my marriage.
