I'm a deeply emotionally charged person. You all know this. I tend to always let my emotions govern my actions. It's who I am. I can't just stop that, so I have to embrace it to some degree and accept it.
John, we all have emotions, but to quote Coach, "Prisons are full of people that let their emotions govern their actions".
It's OK to have emotions, but part of maturity is developing a reasonable level of self-control and acting in accordance with your principles whether it "feels" right or not.
That area of your brain near the back of your skull that is all about fear, anger and such... it ain't who YOU are. It's only a part of who you are... just like everybody else.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
I am singing with the choir. I have pooked fun, but like everyone else that has commented on your sitch we want you to succeed and be happy in the end. Keep detaching it feels great even liberating...I have not thought about my STBXW in weeks. I am not sure hwta the future holds for me, but I know it will be great!!
I do feel good without the ring on. I feel liberated and somewhat free to do what I want with my life. I know it's symbolic, and lots of LBS getting really upset seeing their WAS take theirs off... but I now feel liberated my taking mine off.
I not only feel good about it, but I think if I ever put it back on again it would be MY choice to do so. It would be my own self choosing to put it back on - not out of obligation or expectation.
And I think that is where my W is at in all of this too. She wants the choice to re-invest into this R and M if she can. It's what all the counselors and therapists have told me individually and with her in the room, her shaking her head the whole time.
She's young. Only 24 years old... and she has missed a lot of life having a child at 20 years old. She's rebelling against that and hoping that she can make the choice herself this time to have a life with me because she wants to, not because we have a child together.
I want the same. But, I'm not so sure we can get there.
----"Et tu, Brute?"---- me:28 W:24 S4 T:6 M:4 EA Exposed: 5/21/10 Bomb: 6/20/10 (Father's Day) NC w/ OM: 7/10/10 W moved out 8/21/10 http://bit.ly/aOrZne - My sitch
