Her: "I just watched them pulling those Chilean miners out. I don't want to get trapped in a cave. I have a bad feeling about it".
I guess the thing is though Time, if she hasn't asked you for your help overcoming a fear, then your hands are kind of tied. Well of course you can offer your support and help if she wants it. But she's got to be the one to decide to ask for help, or accept your offer of help.
If you argue or try to reason her out of her fear, all you're doing then is invalidating her and her fear.
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
If you argue or try to reason her out of her fear, all you're doing then is invalidating her and her fear.
I don't have to. "I wish I weren't such a fraidy cat" is an expression she used just today. But for the life of me, I can't imagine telling her anything she doesn't already know, so I sort of skipped responding to that one remark and focused on a positive in another sentence"
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
I don't have to. "I wish I weren't such a fraidy cat" is an expression she used just today. But for the life of me, I can't imagine telling her anything she doesn't already know, so I sort of skipped responding to that one remark and focused on a positive in another sentence"
See, I think she was inviting you to say something here.
And she might have interpreted you skipping over what she said, as ignoring or dismissing her concerns.
In the past when I've said something to my H, like what your W said to you, what I wished I would have heard would have been like...
'Yes, I'm sorry you're afraid of doing 'x' too. But I believe in you and know you can overcome it if you really want. And if you need my support in doing so, just let me know how I can help - I'll be there for you!'
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
Decided to experiment by taking the dogs rollerblading (I know they call them in-line skates nowdays, but mine really are Rollerblade™ skates).
Summary: Minor disaster 10 minutes into it when the dogs got over-excited and decided to attack one another. Nobody but me got hurt, and my cuts were minor.
This is going to take a while to perfect.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
Decided to experiment by taking the dogs rollerblading (I know they call them in-line skates nowdays, but mine really are Rollerblade™ skates).
Summary: Minor disaster 10 minutes into it when the dogs got over-excited and decided to attack one another. Nobody but me got hurt, and my cuts were minor.
