While things are generally good and slowly progressing I have no tolerance left if CB.
I have to be careful for not turning into controlling. I have gained lot of confidence that I can bring up issues that I don't agree with whereas just months ago I would have gotten my head bit off for that.
I have been calling out CB and setting new boundaries. Surprisingly W is cooperating and working with me on that. Every once awhile she slipps back and I have to put my foot down again.
Strangely I actually have to force myself to do this because often it is not a big deal.
Last night she blew me off for a previously scheduled dinner date. I actually sent her a text telling her that I'm giving her a cake and that she is eating it too and I will stop that.
That prompted a phonecall back which I did not answer. Shortly after she texted that she is on her way and will stop to take-out some food. Asked what I would like.
I did not answer, got up and left the house before she got home.
She was still up when I returned with bunch of stuff sitting on the stove. She got up and started warming things up.
I looked at her and said "If you are doing it for me I appreciate it, but I already ate, thanks." and I went to bed.
Moments like that make me think what I want from this R. Do I want to continue to work on it? The progress has been amazing and I know that there is a way to go and more time to spend.
I have to take a serious look at my expectations. Too much of that will turn me back into a person she began to hate.
