Nobody would blame me for having some fun with my H (I think). We have had a sex starved marriage MOST of our 15 years together. We averaged having sex less than 10 times a year. I have lurked on the SS message boards for years and years.
He is talking about why he went and looked at porn instead of approaching me. It's interesting but...so what?? It was immature and selfish. Most on here would say he was cheating our entire marriage.
He tells me he has been intimidated by me since he met me. I had it all together. Ok, again, interesting but....
I told him I made a huge mistake "chasing him". He was gorgeous, smart, and a "catch". He made minimal efforts, and it has continued all our marriage. I keep us together, and now that I refuse to do that any longer, we are falling apart.
I am bored with him. I won't go back to the same R with him. I feel him sucking me back to that and I won't go. I was out walking with my neighbors (a nightly ritual that I haven't been able to participate in for years) and he calls me and starts bitching about S15's math teacher--HELLO!! I AM NOT GOING TO BE LISTENING TO THIS DURING MY TIME!!!
I told him this was MY time, and to bring it up when I get home. NO RESPECT!!
I get home and there is no mention of it. Honestly?? I never want to listen to him bitch again. I'm done with it.
We took Gary Chapman's 5 LL test online. I told the C that he was acts of service and physical touch. He took the test and declared himself PT first and Words of Affirmation 2nd.
I don't know ANY words people that curse, bitch, moan, etc like he does. I don't think he wants to admit what he really is. He doesn't like himself anyway--why would he admit to what he really is??
But I thought it interesting he took the test, then had me take it (I am words by a MILE, then PT) and printed both results. He says he "sees" how his anger has affected my LLs. Is this a huge thing? I do want to be fair....
OG (other guy) called last night after being away a week. Of course it was lovely ==he is a words guy through and through. And physical touch after that.....
