Yes, that is true, but those things pre-dated the affair, bomb, separation, and divorce process. She is now representing that she wanted to "explore reconciliation" ("explore" -- I love that; commitment-phobic to the bitter end) just 6 months ago.
Perhaps I can clarify. I'll use some arbitrary dates for convenience.
January Year 1 -- STBX: I was thinking we might have to go to marriage counseling someday. SP: Why? STBX: I don't know. I just think we might. I like the idea of having someone listen to me. SP: It sounds to me like you want counseling. STBX: Never mind.
*end of discussion*
October Year 1 -- STBX starts A with Signore Schmuckatelli
December Year 1 -- STBX: You know if you don't do something about things, something might go away. SP: What does that mean? STBX: If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you.
*end of discussion*
February Year 2 -- STBX: I want a divorce.
March Year 2 -- STBX agrees to go to marriage counseling, later reveals it was to trick SP into surrendering financial rights ("but don't you see how I tried to save the M?"); SP starts reading.
March-July Year 2 -- in-house separation; STBX continues A; STBX spends lots of time yelling at SP, slapping SP, spitting on SP, & etc.; SP DB's.
July Year 2 -- STBX moves out; starts Fling 1 while in A1 with Signore Schmuckatelli
September Year 2 -- STBX heartbroken over collapse of A1, compensates with Flings 2 and 3; suggests STBX and SP go to couples' counseling, but says "be clear, it's just to work on our co-parenting, there's no point in talking about anything else."
October Year 2 -- STBX heartbroken over collapse of Flings 1-3, goes to SP for comforting, gets upset that SP has met Miss Someone, goes to European City to start A2 with Signore il Secondo.
October-December Year 2 -- STBX announces "a little bit in love" with A2.
November Year 2 - March Year 3 -- STBX instructs Lawyer to run up SP's legal bills as much as possible, tells mutual acquaintance "that's why I hired a ball-busting attorney, because I'm going to bust SP's balls, that a**hole."
August Year 3 -- STBX: Words can not express how truly and deeply I hate you.
September Year 3 -- STBX: You know, back in October Year 2, while I was starting A2 and finishing Flings 1, 2, and 3, and after I had called you all those names and accused you of all those things and told everyone we know how much I hate you, I was really thinking there was a chance we could explore reconciliation. SP: That's funny, I don't recall that; did you actually say anything about that? STBX: No, I just assumed you would know. But what would that have taken? SP: Honesty and no more acting like a teenager. STBX: What??? Who do you think you are?? I would NEVER have agreed to that!
Now then, irrespective of what she did before October Year 1, warning me that "something" "might" "go away" if I didn't do "something" about that "something" at "some point," am I really supposed to believe that last month's (Sept 3) story bears any relationship to reality? Am I supposed to believe her or my experience of her?
