I am new to your sitch and don't know the whole story, but parts of it jumped out at me due to a lot of similarities with mine.
My H was in an 8 month A and I successfully busted it with DB techniques. They ended it and we were in piecing for six months.
In retrospect, I took him back too easily and too quickly. I didn't think so at the time, but I can see it now.
Please be very cautious and I am glad to hear you have low expectations. The WAS needs to do A LOT of work to figure out how they made these destructive choices in the first place, and be willing to do A LOT of sacrificing to rebuild trust. Your boundaries must be rock solid and clearly and firmly communicated and maintained.
Let me tell you... the pain the second time around is so much worse.
The only saving grace is that you are stronger and have grown so much that you can get through it better.
So take the time now, before your meeting with the FT, and figure out what your boundaries, expectations, and requirements are to reconcile and rebuild trust. Because once your emotions get triggered (love, memories, hopes, dreams)... it is much harder to stand firm.
Having said all that.... my hopes are high for you! There are definitely positive signs.
