The biggest mistake people make in these situations is to become needy, desparate and begin acting out in passive - aggressive behavior. This is the most UNattractive behavior you could exhibit. How in the world could expect someone to desire this? It is depressive.
You are not living in a John Keats poem. This is the real world. Strength, confidence, discpline are required.
The first thing you need to do is realize this is another living being. They are not your simease twin nor were they created to exclusively be your object of love and desire. They have toughts, emotions, desires and the ability to act on them. At any time in anyway they feel. And they can change their mind without a moments notice or reason.
Hopefully, you can wrapped your mind around that because the next thing you need to do is realize that describes you also. You are a living being. And you need to continue to live. Take 30 - 60 - 90 days to find yourself and forget about the other person. Limited contact, freedom to explore the world around you, learn how to love yourself again.
That is easier said then done. I read many people hear writing about how they are detached or "dark" then type over and over day after day hour after hour about their spouse and relationship problems. They are not taking the needed time to remove themselves from the problem in their life. So the problem never seems to go away. Try it.
Quote:
Me again (15 minutes later): "I'm sorry. That wasn't fair of me. I'm a desperate man and I know it could work given half a chance and I can't tell you how hopeless and devastated I feel. Please please please reconsider just 1 more try. What's the risk of it?"
the risk is you aint never gonna change. and you will always be desperate, hopeless and devastated. Try something different.
