@B.A.& Kat>>Court was so exhausting yesterday that I haven't recovered enough to think clearly. My 7 yr old is very sick today with a fever & throwing up, poor little guy!
In a nutshell, my L arrived unprepared. She doesn't work on Fridays, they knew that & filed a new declaration & other documents on Friday afternoon, saying they had been accidently filed under the wrong case#/wrong court. Incredible that they got away with all the dirty things they did.
First of all sorry your little one is sick and hope he gets better.
Your H and his L sound like a real fine piece of work. So did you come to a settlement and is it one you can live with or are things still up in the air.
I absolutely hate court proceedings!!! They just absolutely suck the life right out of you and so often lack common sense and reasoning all "in the name of justice."
Funny how in court rooms fair play and honesty just fly out the window. Sorry things didn't go as smoothly as you had hoped. Big hugs to your son. Hope he feels better soon.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Whew...just when I thought the wild ride was over.
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@BA>>>Your H and his L sound like a real fine piece of work. So did you come to a settlement and is it one you can live with or are things still up in the air.
I absolutely hate court proceedings!!! They just absolutely suck the life right out of you and so often lack common sense and reasoning all "in the name of justice."
I called H & said I wanted to settle our MSA immediately, I had some #'s for him. If he didn't agree, my original L would take over & we would head straight into attorney h@ll. Considering the last few months of only dealing with visitation, etc., were painfully expensive, and as you say BA, suck the life right out of you, I guessed he would jump on the chance.
@Kat-It didn't really matter how dirty his L was, the only ones who really made out were the L's.
So, I had everything laid out when he arrived for our meeting. What I would accept & what I wouldn't.
Bottom line, I'm ready to wrap this up, get the MSA signed off by L's & be done with it.
Well...guess who's not so done all of a sudden!
-Doesn't know "how we got here." -Should have never left. -Should have come right back. -Loved being married to me. -Let's go p/u S7 & get some lunch.
I might have fallen for that before (I did in the beginning), not a chance now.
I asked him to have the changes made & get the agreement back so we can hopefully wrap it up in the next couple of weeks.
S& is feeling a little weak, but made it to school for picture day. So sweet...wanted to wear the same thing as last year, "But I thought you said I looked nice in that shirt!"
Ah yes their timing is always remarkable. Just as they see us moving on with our lives, completely detaching from them and having some semblance of happiness they want to swoop on in and tell us how sorry they are and what a big mistake they made, yada, yada, yada...
BA-No agreement yet. Not one word about it since we went over the final changes. Could be that it's close to the end of the year & he wants to stall so we file M'd jointly. Only problem with that is we have a court date in Dec. that the judge called "the last," or she will dismiss the case.
Kat-rather than things in my life sorting out, the opposite happened. My S18 is full blown out of control in every self-destructive way, so I've had to drop the rope with him also. My efforts to help him had the predictable result of making the situation worse. An addict can't be helped unless/until they make that decision. He has lost his job & is failing all his college classes.
This is hands down the most difficult time in my life...S18 was just here, pounding on the glass door, raging. Left before police could get here. Friend that's known him all his life was here, couldn't believe it if hadn't witnessed it himself.
I am very sorry about the situation with your S18. You are exactly right though - an addict can't be helped until it is their decision to want help. I am going through the same situation with a sister who now finds herself in jail because of the choices she has made in life.
Sunny, you got all my love and my positive thinking and prayers coming your way. I hope he gets out of this wiser and healthy. And I believe he will because these reactions do not dismiss the fact that he had had a great mom. Love Maria
