However, I have been helping men like you for a long long time and know what I am talking about. It goes against every fiber in your being to do what I say..
This is all meant to SAVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP....
To save it YOU have to let her feel like SHE somehow is getting dumped now...
Why?
IT WORKS.....
Women operate on feelings.. Her feelings says she isn't attracted to you.... The only way for HER to FEEL that you have heard her and understand her is to do what I said...
"WAW, I now get it. You are not attracted to me. It must feel terrible to think you have to stay with a man you are not in love with or attracted to. I don't blame you for wanting out if you feel that way. I would want out too if I felt that way about about a woman. I now get it. I can't possibly stay with a woman who doesn't find me attractive. Let's both move on. I am not sure what I feel about you anymore now either. I don't know why I haven't seen this before. I get it now."
THEN follow through on that.. It really is that simple and easy. You gain instant respect. Why? BECAUSE you have finally told her you have heard her. You have not tried to change her mind.. This is HOW TO VALIDATE... How can she NOT feel validated now? You have just told her that you understand what she is saying.. She isn't attracted to you in the right way and she is SCARED to hurt you. She is hoping you can get the message without her having to spell it out. (of course you are NOT getting it so it is slowly crumbling and drip drip drip)
When you tell her you "get it" and tell her it is now YOU who can't live this way either, instantly she secretly wonders if she is making a mistake. Instead of her thinking "how do I let him down easlily? she thinks.. "is THIS what I want? he HAS been such a good man.. He has always loved me... what if I am making a mistake?"
You have changed her frame of reference just by telling her you understand and that you are now going to let her go and be the INITIATOR of moving on down the road..
It will only work is SHE tells you she WANTS to be with you. Quit making it complicated.
