"I'm filing for divorce, when the divorce is final, I plan on starting a new relationship with another person. I'm telling you now because I don't want to feel guilty and be labeled a cheater. Regardless of our marriage problems, I have enough respect for you and myself for that matter to not cheat while married."
"I'm filing for divorce, when the divorce is final, I plan on starting a new relationship with another person. I'm telling you now because I don't want to feel guilty and be labeled a cheater. Regardless of our marriage problems, I have enough respect for you and myself for that matter to not cheat while married."
No you did the right thing by calling her out on the CB. She knew she was behaving badly and was disrespectful to you the way she was acting. She blew up and you let her go. Now she she's you are a man she can trust. YOU DONE GOOD.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Hey thanks! It was a hard weekend but I did let her go. Did not even argue with her, even helped. It was selfish of her. Now she tells me she hardly goes on FB anymore. I guess I cured her of that!
Surely you have read elsewhere about the dangers of doing what “feels right.”
Remember that isn’t just about your coming to terms with what happened - it is about her regaining trust. And there is nothing that destroys trust more than an A. Perhaps you feel she is now deserving of your trust.
When you have been setting boundaries, it has worked - I’m 100% with Coach on this one here. The thing to watch out for is to get roped back into the old patterns that did not work.
Be careful of sending mixed messages that will give the impression that your boundary is not a firm one.
Originally Posted By: Atossup
She asks if I will shop and talk with her. I needed a few things.
What message do you think this sends? (That you are pretty much available and willing to drop your other priorities if she asks).
Originally Posted By: Atossup
Outside we hugged again.
“We” don’t hug - one or the other initiates the hug. If you are the initiator, what message do you suppose that sends?
The hug was mutual Arnie, we both wanted it and it was the 1st Time I did not initiate it and she really hugged me. No she has alot to regain my trust and I know I have to regain hers for the letting the disconnect happen even thogh she let that happen also. Usually we have just talked about the Co sessions and I was prepared for that again. She asked to meet ME, which was a 1st. I had initiated the other MEETINGS to get stuff signed for the house or to give her some paperwork to get her off my accounts. And she mentioned I looked good. I have lost 20 pds and fit into old pants. Nothing like a new man with a new woman pleasing attitude that she might not get!!
