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#2090613 10/17/10 10:06 PM
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soleil Offline OP
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How's that for a new thread title? LOL.

I figure it's beter to have a happy/crazy sounding one than a sad/wistful/melodramtic one.

grin

Each day gets a little better, though I do have my setbacks but whatever, gotta move on.

Did see on the court docs that the last motion for court stbx filed...he withdrew completely the day we were at court. And we are going back to the same thing next month (nice).

He texted me at almost 2 a.m. last night saying:

He doesn't know what to do! But he misses me and he misses me soo very much and he hopes that I amhappy because he is definitely not.

I don't understand this. No comprende. I didn't respond and I'm not really sure what to say to that...?



Me: 29
Got a ticket to the D concert
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Ever heard of drunk dailing.... IDK maybe drunk texting.

I don't know your whole situation... but it would take more than a 2am text to get a\ANY of my attention... otherwise chalk it up to more of the crazy train.


M:47
M:18
D16, S19
1st S 1/08-5/08
Reconciled/May 7, 2008
Left again Nov 9, 2009
I Filed: Nov 17, 2009
Final: April 14, 2010
EX walked away from kids too



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Hey, I would like for my STBXW to have once shown she missed me in the last 18 months. Not the ice queen.

That's a tough one. Have you totally given up? What if he showed up at court and said he didn't want the D? What conditions would you have?


Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11
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http://tiny.cc/thread2
http://tinyurl.com/ydtphqu
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My ex is known for her drunk texting. Sounds like that to me. I have had similar ones in the past, but it has been quite some time since I have gotten one.


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soleil Offline OP
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Yes, that was my first thought. That he was drunk texting me. Or that he really does miss me. or that he's saying this cause we have a court date coming up in 3 weeks and well you know what happened the last time. Who knows. I didn't respond back but was thinking about responding and anyway, what would I say? What do you guys advise? I do miss him, too. Grr.

Originally Posted By: ClingingToHope
That's a tough one. Have you totally given up? What if he showed up at court and said he didn't want the D? What conditions would you have?


I don't know how I'd react to that, CTH. I cannot imagine that scenario as being a reality...Just can't see it happening.

Does this mean my heart is hardening? Oh dear. Idk anything.

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Sol, he has a history of being manupalative...just like STBXW. I don't think they realize they do it but they just are that way. If I were to give you my guess I would say he probably does miss you for short instances. However, because the court date is coming up once again he's trying to start a dialogue and trying to portray that he's up at 2am thinking about you which is BS. He's probably up anyway and decides it's a good time to send that text.

CTH asked a good question i.e. what do you want to happen? Personally I think it's too little too late for him and if there's anything that might happen should happen after the D and depending on how the D goes.

I don't think there's a reason to respond to his text unless you just want to say "I am happy, happier than I've been for quite some time. However, I've asked you to not text me- to me words are cheap"


Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6
Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks
Aug 2006, left again
Apr 2007, filed for divorce
Dec 2007, reunited
Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
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Sounds like a drunk text to me, and people are most lonely and upset when drunk. Their subconscious feelings are more likely to come out at that point. However, when their sobering fog resets, you most likely won't get the same words from them. Ignore it. Believe nothing you hear, and only half of what you see. Till he can show you how he feels, which may be never, don't try to mind read his intentions.
Shock


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What's the golden rule of DB? Believe nothing of what they (the WAS) say ...and only 50-percent of what they do? Right?


Me: 49
WAW: 47
S11, S7
Years Married/Together: 17/18
Bomb: 6/15/07
Separation: 7/6/07
D: 4/3/09

Real love is a decision.
Marriage is a commitment.
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soleil Offline OP
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^ You're right.

Originally Posted By: ImprovedRomeo
I don't think there's a reason to respond to his text unless you just want to say "I am happy, happier than I've been for quite some time. However, I've asked you to not text me- to me words are cheap"


You are cracking me up. I am just picturing myself saying that and twirling around like a ballerina. Hahaha. Did you start a new thread yet, IR?

Oh, do you guys like my new thread title? I was going to change it but now I can't. So we'll stick with that.

A few months ago I would have texted him right back...maybe I am getting better.

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I like the new thread title and I do think your are getting better. Good for you to not text him back. Missed you sol. I've been thinking of you and praying for you all along! Sorry it's been a while.

Sol - only u know what u want. If u want to be back with him that's wonderful. My only advise would be to NOT make it easy on him. He's put you through hell for a really long time, playing with your emotions... I'm not saying to torture him back, but make sure you're not letting him off the hook either. You are worth fighting for. Remember that. He's not the prize - you are. Make him remember that!

Stay positive... you're doing great!


When you are happy as an individual, you are in a better position to determine whether a partner enhances your happy life or weighs it down.
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