Yeah, the "not confusing the kids" bit is odd in that she doesn't stay the night after late functions, etc., but she makes the plans for Sunday family time. The kids might not be confused, but there are enough conflicting messages to make my head spin.
Fortunately, D doesn't seem to be imminent, but who knows. I can't seem to count on anything I see or hear. After the family events and dinners (she's planned another meal after my S5's ball game Friday night) I just try to stay in the moment, enjoying the time out of the house. Tried the P90X yoga for the first time Monday, maybe the breathing works.
Good to know that finding the love or passion for the W doesn't necessarily come automatically. I know it will take time for me. Guess this path has been walked before as well.
M / W: 43 D8 S6 M 10 years / T 13 years W admitted EA/PA: 10.6.09 Separated in same house 10.6.09 W moved out 2.27.10
Wibble Wobbles, wobble but they don't fall down!!!
Sorry to say...but I NOW have a mental image of a missher bobble head, that we call lord of the rings. LMAO....just LMAO.
Your doing fine bude. Thanks for the chat the other day.
Oh..and happy little friday!
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
I screwed up and got sucked into an argument with my wife just now over the phone.
I am off all week as I am preparing for some special guests to arrive this Thursday for a long weekend . Today, I have a parent teacher conference with my son's teacher, and my W will be there also.
So I get a call from her about an hour ago, and I let it go to voice mail as I never want to be caught off guard by what she might say, plus it gives me time to center myself before I talk with her. Well it did not help this time.........
Her v-mail was to confirm the parent/teacher appointment later today and she said she wanted to "ask" me something else. When I called back it was pleasant and I told her how our S was home sick today but getting better. After that she asked if I could take our S10 back on Sunday morning b/c she got free tickets to the football game, (Panthers suck this year, so who cares).
Told her I could not b/c I have very special guests coming intown and I will be returning them to the airport on Sunday at various times. She said well then she would get the new roommate to watch S10 while she went to the game. Wife rents a room in a house that is shared with the owner of the house and one other lady, son hates it over there and there are no friends and nothing for him to do while she is at a game for 6 hours!!!!
I said that I am not comfortable with this and said that I don't agree with it. Well that is when the "fit hit the shan". We put on the gloves and went at it. Mostly her attacking me, and me defending myself instead of using the "I am sorry you feel that way".
The conversation ended up her hanging up after I asked what time she was going so I could come get our S10 and bring "Him back to His HOME!!!" (probably could have worded that differently but it sure felt good at the time) I did drop a few truth darts (more like "truth grenades") on her, and I hate to say it but it felt good.
I am not feeling regretful either right now, maybe it is the "Good News" call that came in while me and the W were having it out, more on that in a minute.
Well now, she has texted me twice. First text reads....
Don't change your plans...I won't go
second text 13 minutes later,
Just let me know u got the text. I gave the ticket away. Don't change ur plans.
I have not responded and I am inclined not to. Problem is I have to see her in about 2.5 hours at 2:40 EST. I am thinking about not going at all but I really need to make sure I know what is going on with my S10's advanced class.
UUUUGGGGGHHHHH If I go I will have to ignore her as I don't think I could engage her in any rational conversation, she is freaking NUTS!!!!!
This comes at a time when I am cycling and honestly I am growing tired of this. More on the "good news" in another post.
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
Sometime the truth darts/grenades or nukes in your cases are needed.
Your tired right now and I can relate on many many levels.
Look buddy, your human and sometime this chit happens.
I would not apologize to her for the outburst at all – if she brings it up and apologizes well then you should be man enough to admit where YOU may have said things differently.
Take a step back , breath, you’ll be alright dude!
Look, the biggest thing right now is to learn from this. What can you take out of this to make YOU continue to BE the man that YOU want to be.
Now, pick your skinny tall ass back up and keep steppin…
You know how to reach me if ya want chat.
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
In the past I would feel bad after something like this happened and now that I am reflecting on the conversation, I really didn't do that bad other than defending myself.
She still blames me b/c D13 will not talk to her and I quickly came back with "that is not my fault".
I don't feel bad, and in a sick sorta way I am glad she is on "FULL F*CKING SPIN CYCLE" right now. For so long I have been eating the sh!t she has dished out and I am not going to eat anymore. I just need to learn how to better say,
"No thank you W, I do not want another plate of your sh!t".
Originally Posted By: ericmsant2
Now, pick your skinny tall ass back up and keep steppin…
On second thought, what is the calorie count on a plate of sh!t these days?????
I have put on some weight, just need a new "sh!t free" diet.
cheers
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
The good news I got while I was on the phone with my W, literally. While I was on the phone with her the Company I interviewed with over 2 months ago called!!!!
They wanted to make sure I was still available and interested!!! The recruiter said that they would be calling me back today or tomorrow with "something" and that I would look upon it "favorably".
This would be a lateral move but it would get me out of my current situation where my boss openly doesn't like me and honestly I feel like this would be another "new" start for me. Hopefully it will also be a little bit of a raise and additionally, I will be able to access the rest of my 401K in the form of a rollover to a traditional IRA that I could access to keep me in the kids in the house.
This is such a HUGE piece of the goals I set formyself over a year ago. It is something that I can feel good about for me!!! I am definitely on the coaster today.....
Okay...so you let a chit fly her way. Feel better now? probably? Gonna feel better tomorrow? That my friend is the big question.
Quote:
I am not sure if I should respond to her texts.
Do YOU want to? Fuc* dude - you tell me...you are the one driving ths ship are you not? Ins't all of this YOUR choice?
Missher, don't let today's emotional rollercoaster divert you from what in YOUR heart you really want. I have done this way toooo often - "feelings" - we can control them. And if we can't well then to me it is a sign of more work that is needed.
Hey - Miss...I want want to be frank with ya buddy.
You still love her.
Your still hurt
It's okay...just don't throw the pain her way - she's hurt too.
Unfair?
Yep, but fuc* dude, life isn't fair at least sometimes.
What we do when life is fair......that is what really matters isn't it.
Right now your fustrated, detached, questioning chit, cycling, pissed, a host other emotions.
All of this is YOUR choice.
Can you choose to give it all you have for ONE more day!
Justa little more...for just that chance dude....
Remember this when you see her later.
Remeber who Missher is!
Just be YOU!
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
As you know, my kids are my hot button too (much hotter than yours, you manage to maintain your cool far more often than I do ). Keep it about your son, pretend like nothing happened and just go back to your calm, cool, confident self.
It's just a blip.
Originally Posted By: WS
Let the Conspiracy begin!!!
I feel Very Special already!! Seedy and P are the
REAL SPECIAL ONES!.
Thanks buddy ... but I'm no more special than everyone else ... just trying to keep it real and pay it forward!
Hmmmmmmm .... now who do we know that has a birthday coming up on this very special LIVE Little Friday ... hmmmmmm .....
Peace PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
. Today, I have a parent teacher conference with my son's teacher, and my W will be there also.