hmm, I think i need to cut the Hi texts. No actually i know I need to stop but when I tried like I said the absolute stress/panic attack from him blind sided me Have only seen this once before when i left him. i will figure out how. This evening he texted me. Nothing exciting just about business that he really didn't need to deal with. He hasn't done that for a while. He doesn't normally communicate with me once he is with her. Tomorrow i am going to an art gallery. Something i never would have done when H was around. Don't know whether I will like it or not but how about I just go find out? LOL Opportunities galore await me.
TG I am so much calmer now then I used to be. I went and sought out counselling and found atechnique that allows me to deal with the pain. I can honestly say for the first time in a long time and longer than this has been going on I feel like me. I hit rock bottom about a month ago, just not thinking I could go on. i did and with the techniques I learned I am in a much better place to start working on me. I have been doing more for myself and my girls and not letting him change the plans like I used to at one point.
It doesn't happen anymore. I will get stronger and I will take it as slowly as I need to. a lifetime of habit doesn't disappear overnight but it will happen LOL
