Beth83, yes, I've been with him 27 years, 23 of them married. We were both 20 when we met. It is not only about our time spent together, its about whole my world, my life, everything that I ever had, knew, loved, wanted and felt comfortable with. Now I feel as if I'm robbed for the past 30 years of my life, there is nothing that is mine there any more, no place that I can go for comfort, taking "me" time, being at peace. He will have all this and I am forced to find new life.

Why I say that? We met at the dropzone, both were skydivers. Flying/skydiving is a big part of our lives. His team have been competing at several World championships and World cups, and today he is recognised instructor and tandem master. Both my BILs skydive too, one of them is a world known authority in base jumping, inventor/designer and world No1. manufacturer of wingsuit (its his patent/design). His GF skydives too.The other one is a cameraman. I can't skydive now due to health issues, but I am always around. So you can imagine that skydiving was a common conversation theme of our family gatherings often, our circle of friends is from there too. If indeed there is an OW4, and if she is the one I suspect it might be, then she will just replace me - another skydiver.

We studied together, same university, same subjects, same majors, same minors, same degree (Mech.Eng.). We got scholarships from the same company and worked there for a while, just different departments, but in two neighbouring buildings. Our professional lives split eventually, he joined military, but we remained in the same professional area, similar jobs/positions. He can retire from active duty within a year time, so just 2-3 months before he left he was pretty enthusiastic about joining me in my company after retirement, to further develop it together. I own a company and he was a great support ever since foundation, literally till the last day.

Now what? I lose everything, not just him, the family (my only one, I' don't have my primary family any more, all died) but the whole my life as I knew it, I am forced to build a new life, new circle of friends, avoid the dropzone (the only one here)... Just can't imagine it, too hard cry

Sky

Me:48
H:48
M:23, T:27
DD 24
Bomb 1 07/27/10,IDLY,moved out without notice while I was at funeral
Bomb 2 09/30/10, "I can't return home, I want D"
Found out OW in picture since 07/09
D'd: 04/01/11