FWIW I think that MLC is a good forum to be in even post divorce. We understand each other, all having been in the same boat, and for too long.
Agreed! This is where your friends are, this is the group that best understands what led you to D.
Originally Posted By: beatrice
I do think many MLCers feel the divorce wipes the slate clean.
My H even used these words when explaining D to me.
Originally Posted By: beatrice
The other type of divorce seems to happen quite a bit later in the crisis, although the MLCer may well have been talking about it for a good while. I think they want to feel an end to the guilt and conflict, and instead of working on themselves they seek yet another external fix. What do others think?
This is where we are right now after 3 years of separation. H started talking financial settlement in the early days but no mention of D. Lately there's talk of both and although I give him every opportunity to take care of it he takes no action. It's an interesting thought that it's an external fix, Beatrice....yet another one eh?
Originally Posted By: beatrice
My h has actually said that he thinks that once we are divorced we could start over . . . . which is strange thinking to me. I was being argumentative, which isn't wise with a MLCer, but we are only human after all, and said I did not see it that way. Divorce ended any legal right that he might have to contact me, and that it was a high risk strategy. There was a lot of silence after that.
Another conversation H and I have had twice in recent times.
