Now just journaling... I again feel so much better after my run. Ran a little further than usual. I know I can't change what I did getting emotional etc. after he told me he thought he wanted a divorce, wasn't sure if he was 'going through a phase'. Would it really have mattered? I again would have tried to work on the marriage but would it have helped if he was already having at least an EA? Probably not. We needed to hit rock bottom for anything to change. I now have changed and am much healthier. I know as of this morning that I do deserve better. I would still go to MC if he changed his mind one day but, I think it is time I start to date when/if I meet someone. I am by no means ready for a long term commitment again, but I am ready to live my life as much as I can while being a resident.
While I feel this good right now, too many days I have experienced the roller coaster. I know my emotions may ambush me again, I will just enjoy the feeling of contentment right now.
Hope all is well with the rest of you.
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
