WAW 20 years and wants out

[Pensacolabroken]

She came home 1045 ish..

I was at the door and I just looked at her. She said, "whats that look for"?

Went up stairs and closed her door. I was fuming. I considered my goals and the consequence. I confronted her. After some CB from both, I asked her where she was, she said at the beach alone listening to the radio and thinking about things.

I said BS you were out with him. She denied it. Said she was done talking to me.

I came back upstairs and told her I was leaving, She immedietely opened her door and stood there and asked me where I was going? I said away. I said I can no longer live like this when I know there is another man involved and I cant trust her. We would work out the financial stuff next week and I was leaving.

She stood there and I could see I had her attention. I stopped and asked her should I walk out the door or is she going to open up her heart and mind so we could fix this. She came down stairs sat opposite in a chair and for the first time told me she was going through a lot of stuff, and there is no other man... he is only a friend. I told her he is more than that and pointed out all the evidence.. I told her that HAS to be resolved. She said I am too controlling and that my controlling her has led to all the fights and all the misery..

We rehashed the last 3 months etc.. and I told her I am trying to better myself and my marriage but I am the only one committed to it and she has "checked out".

She brought up the past and stated I was controlling, and disrepectful of her in front of our son because we fight and I yell. I didnt see the frequency as she does, but I can admit there were times I am and was not pleasant to be around. She said she wanted to go to counseling 10 years ago and I refused. I told her my eyes are open now. I am ready to put it all out there.

She said she committed to MC and went to the Counselors web page and confirmed she is going to go to MC with an open mind. She said she is at a fork in the road. She said she has not picked a direction.

Regarding TKD dude, I asked why he was still on FB. She said he is my friend. I said he is a barrier. She said next you will tell me no more TKD.. I told her I am not giving her an ultimatim. She said "I know you and you will".

She said I should sleep in my own house. But the decision to leave or stay was mine.

I told her since this was the first time we have really talked about any issue, I would stay for now.

Wow this sucks.