Been dealing with an emotionally abusive spouse for quite some time. ..... I guess the point is it truly is impossible to reason with an abusive spouse - they will not hear us anyway.
Been reading Thriving Despite a Difficult Marriage and it truly describes the pain of being in a difficult marriage better than anything else I've seen. My husband fits the description of a dangerous spouse according to the book.
Welcome to DB Bernita... I am so sorry to hear of what you are going through; clarity is helping you it sounds like and reading and getting understanding allows us to detach and "move on". Your H sound like he has "a point to make" and the blame all points to you (as all abusers do)...so have you "walked away?" or thinking about running away like I did...LOL...
The more we "don't respond in fear and hurt" toward how they treat us; the more "power" we take out of their abuse...My abusive husband is still trying to fix the blame on me for leaving him. I am sure that DIVORCE will all be my fault as I have waited patiently for him to be humble and loving and seek "the good of our marriage" and have compassion toward me to "change" his behavior. He refuses ALL counseling and I think he is an IDIOT. He LOST ME! I did not walk away, I RAN and I am GLAD that I did!!!! NO ONE deserves to be abused!!!!
Sending hugs; keep posting and "playing your cards close to your chest" and taking care of yoursel...(you know that ANYONE can read these posts; you don't have to be member to read, be careful what you say: anything I have said, I have posted with the full consciousness that my soon to be EX husband may read this, figure out that this is ME and that I am talking about HIM...I say; good for him.)
M -12 Years 1 9 y son (w/me) S-Nov 2009 (and LOVING it; will NEVER go back!) D-soon
