She knows I am completely detached and looking to move on with my life. I know am the best option and I think what's holding her backsince she siad it to our friend is the trust factor. To go back to one of my early posts, I said I hade anxiety and sleep issues. This truely effected our M.
She told me in the past about the issues but I didn't act on her suggestions to get them checked out. I didn't validate her opinion.
Well all that changed once the bomb hit me. I made the necessary changes for me. In our convo when she called to want to "try" she mentioned the above and even added "If I didn't leave you then you wouldn't be who you are today". Maybe/maybe not. But taking credit for my changes is not her doing, it came from inside me. I needed to change for me. Like we all say around here.
I will let her chase me.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
What does she trust? She doesn't trust that you won't revert back to old ways?
M39 W41 Two children WAW bomb dropped 11/7/09 Piecing Aug 10 - Nov 10 No longer piecing...Nov 10 Separation Jan 11 EA ends again Feb 11 Piecing attempt #2, Mar 11
Part of that I'm sure is true and the fact that I didn't "trust" her recommendation to me to go to a doctor about my issues.
I do feel I'm in control of myself and much happier. I wouldn't allow myself to revert back to where I was over a year ago.
My new perspective on life let's me know that I can/will survive any challenge facing me.
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Cats will chase when they are interested and stimulated by their prey. Be interesting and stimulating. No expectations, no worries and be ready.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Went to D5 school function last night. I refused to bring up R talk. In fact I didn't really talk to W except for asking her about S3 potty training and taking him to the bathroom, He did awesome, thanks for wondering!lol.
Anyway, for those who have been following my sitch, you all know I joined the dating website some time ago, A few months ago I was in contact with a W who's D6 goes to the same school as my D6. She had told me she doesn't date M men. I excepted this and we developed a friendship through our kids. We never went out on a date, we met just one time at the Polish festival
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
Oh F!ck i just posted more but the time ran out on my editing post.
Okay let me see if I can remember what I wrote. I really did not speak to wife except for Son 3 potty training. Wife and I didn't really stand together during the function. I saw other woman and approached her to say hi. We spoke for five minutes tops. I'm not sure if wife saw us talking but I wasn't too concerned.
Okay, later that night I received an e-mail from other woman stating "can I ask you a personal question?" I replied back this morning "sure, fire away"
yesterday I e-mailed the mediator with the financial information needed for the post-marital agreement. I'm at the point now where I feel and think that my wife doesn't have what it takes to reconcile. I am going to email my wife today with the financial information and asked her if she has an amount for me to buy out of the house.
I now know what I need in a relationship. Since communication was a major problem in our marriage and wife still cannot communicate with me I am leaning towards D.
I know relationship talk is not something I should not bring up however I don't believe W has it in her to do the work.
Am I being too impatient? I know I can't bring up relationship talk but is there an exception to the rule?
Any thoughts?
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
I'm at the point now where I feel and think that my wife doesn't have what it takes to reconcile
Sorry this sounds like mind reading to me. Are you into fortune telling? If you are that good at predicitng the future can you pick me some lottery numbers or stock picks.
Originally Posted By: gr8 day 2B alive
Am I being too impatient?
Sounds like it to me. Patiece is the name of the game. Nothing here happens quickly.
I think you are being impatient. You have stated you dont feel she has what it takes to work on M. So keep doing what your doing for yourself, dont obsess as to what your W might do or not do. My 2 cents.
I am worried you are impatient because you want to see this other woman. Only you know when you are done and need to move on, but introducing another third party in this mix is a mistake in my opinion.
Anyway, that's just not how I roll. I'm just not that needy.
Quote:
I know I can't bring up relationship talk but is there an exception to the rule?
If you were done, you wouldn't want to talk about it, so Nope, no exception unless she brings it up.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
