Looking at the staes i think he is in replay or depression but really I have no idea.
So lets look at the positives.
he asked my opinion he kissed me goodbye lately he had been doing blow kisses. he chatted to me about nothing in particular. I organised a good time tonight with friend the girls are happy and content I didn't react the way I normally would when he had a go at me We are parenting more as a team
i was able to explain to him clearly why i didn not want the girls bringing home toys and stuff from his & OW place. This one was fairly important to me as if stuff from her comes into the house I feel I can't toss it out without the girls getting involved in a "situation" the thing is I am decluttering. All I said to him was I am trying to minimise the amount of stuff they have here please leave the stuff they get there over there as i don't want to toss it out as i clean and upset them.
Negatives He was narky at me for no particular reason I am not quite as detached as I want to be. I am much improved but still find myself thinking would he like it?
Last time I tried to remove the pictures of us it truly devastated him. he took it as a sign I wasn't interested in a reconcilliation although he is living with OW. UGH
So I have the pictures up. Not all but a few.
The other thing that I tried to do was cut texting him I would send him one every morning saying Hi. that was it. I stopped it for 3 weeks and he was furious he looks forward to it. He feels me there if I do it.
Now I am moving forward with the one hand behind if he wants to join me but it's the little things that seem to mean the most to him. Not the words I love you but the action of sending him a text. Not the words I am here for you but the pictures on the wall.
I don't say ILY unless he does. So I try and detach in other ways. a new quilt cover, thinking of painting a wall in my bedroom a colour that will make me smile. Little changes that say I am moving forward but leaving the pictures up and keeping the text. Make take up Zumba!
