Been dealing with an emotionally abusive spouse for quite some time. The last straw was on our 25th anniversary this summer. He made a big deal about a video he made of our wedding, took it to work to show all the women what a great guy he was and then when he gave it to me after dinner, he made a point of attacking me about not giving him anything for our anniversary. (We were planning a weekend out of town to celebrate anniversary that weekend where I had planned to buy a special bottle of wine and drink them from crystal used at our wedding). So he brought up Christmas 4 years ago when he did not buy me anything for Christmas and I objected, so he gave me the silent treatment for 4 days until I APOLOGIZED because I was so upset by the silent treatment! His attitude was that I was wrong then, and wrong on our anniversary. I guess the point is it truly is impossible to reason with an abusive spouse - they will not hear us anyway. Been reading Thriving Despite a Difficult Marriage and it truly describes the pain of being in a difficult marriage better than anything else I've seen. My husband fits the description of a dangerous spouse according to the book.
