My H and I are currently living in the same home, sharing the same bed (no sex) while he is trying to figure out if he can love me the way I need to be loved and the way he wants to love a wife (his words, not mine). There is an OW, although it is my understanding from H that he has cut off communication with her, not in order to recommit to our relationship but to be "fair" to all involved while he is making his decision.
He's still involved with her. Rob is right. You should follow his advice. Your husband doesn't know if he can love you? WTH is that? Flip the script? Tell him you don't know if you can love him the way a wife can. Wow! He's "cutting off ties" with her to "fair" to both of you? Um, you are his WIFE, not some sidepiece! How incredibly diplomatic of him. While he decides, she's sending him naked pics of herself masturbating? Nice. Is she still trying to decide what he wants? Whaat you did hasn't worked, right? So try something different-- Let him go! Detach!
