Serenity please dont take offense to this but I see your dead set against any reconcile of my R because of your judgment..
That's called mind reading. It's what you did when you thought your wife needed to be with another man so you encouraged it. Women want their men to fight for and stand up for them. It's attractive.
As long as you allow your wife to attend TKD with the OM you will be stuck.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.